My Point of View
by Scully22
Summary: please review...ch2...Bill Scully Jr. POV... the Scully's, and Mulder, have their annual July 4th celebration. Bill blames Mulder for Melissa's death and Maggie's unhappiness...MSR...rated R for language
1. before

**Chapter 1**

**June 20th**

It's not something I do on purpose, you have to believe me. I put up with him coming to our Christmas events, even to our family traditions, but now, now it's gone too far.

At first it was easy to put up with, it was only once a year or so, nothing too difficult. But after awhile, it became an often thing. I know this may sound stupid of me, or even selfish, I know I should be happy for my sister, but it's not easy.

Since Dad's gone, and Mulder's gotten Melissa killed I'm most worried about mom. Charlie and his wife are never around, and Tara, me and the baby don't come by often either. And Dana always seems to be out of the state, Mulder whisking her off some place or another.

And it's not like I haven't heard what kind of cases they work on. Even being in the army I know about the x-files, I know "spooky's" reputation all too well. But like I said, my main concern is mom. She's the one who, no matter how angry she gets, never says much of anything, she's always the one making everyone else happy- even if it means hurting herself.

Mom is the greatest person I know, and I can't help but think that Mulder's presence in Dana's life is what's making matters worse. Like I said, Charlie is never around to notice, and Dana is always preoccupied. Being the eldest male in the family, I find it my duty to take care of mom, it's what dad would have wanted. So, knowing mom will invite Mulder to our 4th of July get-together, I'll have to devise some sort of plan for which I can execute on that date. I don't have much against Mulder, I just think it's time he was out of our lives, especially mom's… especially Dana's.

**July 3rd**

Well tomorrow is the big day. The day I've been painstakingly avoiding. I'm not exactly sure how well things will go tomorrow, and that idea of a plan never seemed to quite get put together. All I know is that if something goes wrong, if Mulder says anything or mom seems the slightest bit upset I'll have to depend on my army skills to do what I need. I don't plan on shooting Mulder or hitting him, as much as I'd like to, but I know I probably will end up doing one of those by the end of the day.

I'm glad Charlie will be there, he'll understand, unlike my wife who I knew not to discuss this with. Charlie's never met Mulder, only heard about him from mom, but he'll understand once I have a minute to inform him on the truth.

I don't want to think of myself as a bad person, coming up with a plan, threatening to hit Mulder- I'm just trying to do what's best for my family. Family has always been important to every Scully- especially Dana- who's lost some of her family spirit because of Mulder.

All I know right now is that whatever does happen tomorrow I can speak in the name of the Scully family. I know things wont probably go as smoothly as I hope- but hoping is better then thinking about the worst that could happen. And what is the worst that could happen? Scully being upset, maybe, for a little bit, or mom having to admit her dislike for Mulder… those are things that can be helped and solved by family. And family alone.

**July 4th 12:15**

I hate to admit it but I think Tara can tell I'm stressed. She can always tell. She knows that Mulder intimidates me, that he bugs the hell out of me. But she hasn't said anything yet.

After I'd got the baby and baby things packed, along with what we were supposed to bring for food, we headed over to the park. It really wasn't too far away- only an hour and a half or so. Tara and the baby both slept most the way- I love Tara. I've said it to her many times, I've thought it many more, but I'd truly be lost without her. And ever since she's had Matthew my life's felt more complete then ever. Sometimes I feel bad about it though- while my life feels so complete I know mom's feels so empty.

Once we got to the park Tara carried Matthew and I collected what I could of the food. I knew I'd have to take two trips if Charlie hadn't appeared behind me. It was great to see my brother and after a brother-type-of-hug he carried the b-b-q to 'our spot'.

It was obvious mom had studied the park and found the best place she thought. We set out a few blankets, the Scully's liked their space, and Charlie helped me get the b-b-q on its feet.

I had pretty much forgotten about Dana, and Mulder, while I relaxed on the blanket with Matthew. He was playing with some sort of toy duck that Tara had picked out for Christmas for him. I played a small game of tug-of-war then diverted my attention to Tara.

She was sitting with mom, I couldn't really tell what they were talking about. But I figured, since they were busy and Dana wasn't there yet- It'd be a great opportunity to talk to Charlie.

I stood up, carrying Matthew over to mom, then nodded for Charlie to follow me. We walked a ways, not speaking for a while. Once I knew for sure that there was no way mom or Tara could even suspect what we were talking about I stopped dead in my tracks and turned to my brother.

I began slowly, trying to form the correct words, I didn't want to come off too strong- like I'd been thinking about talking to him since June, even though that was indeed the case.

"You know Dana's going to be here…" Charlie nodded at me like it was obvious, I continued, "and you know she's bringing along her partner." Charlie again nodded.

"I know mom has talked to you about Mulder, her partner, but I doubt she's told you the complete truth…" Charlie seemed interested now. I continued my plea, hoping he'd take my side and understand. He did.

But Charlie wasn't a one sided type of guy; "I understand your concern for sis, but I haven't met her partner yet," he continued carefully, "I'm sure you know more then I do about him, since you've been there for Dana more then me, but let me have the chance of making my own observation of this Mulder."

I agreed, it was an agreeable statement. I would have said the same. So I nodded and thanked him for listening, and reminded him that it wasn't too late to be there for Dana, even if he felt he was no longer expected to have as much concern for her. I'd always been closer to Dana.

It seemed that my timing had been most correct, like always. Just as we had reached our blanket and settled down again, Dana and Mulder appeared with food and another blanket.

Mom was the first up of course, she threw her arms around Dana and even shared a welcoming hug with Mulder. Tara hugged Dana, and did the same for Mulder. I spotted Charlie go up to Mulder with a handshake, and I made sure to give Dana my big-brother hug, like I always had. I didn't feel the need to greet Mulder.

**TBC**


	2. it's time

**Chapter 2 **

**July 4th ****2:32**

I've been watching Dana the whole time now, although I'd like to think no one has noticed. From what I've observed I've felt more then once that I'd throw up at any minute. It was so obvious how Dana loved being in Mulder's presence, it was also obvious why mom always invited Mulder. I know that if Mulder weren't here Dana would be more reserved, even in her own family's presence she was tense- but not with Mulder around.

At times I couldn't even look at the two. There were so many things to notice, it was actually hard to keep up. If it wasn't a soft touch or a subtle flirt, it was the words they spoke to each other. It was the way Mulder acted toward Dana that was getting me sick, literally.

But I'm beginning to get ahead of myself here, let me tell you what really set me off and why I've been standing here in the bathroom washing my hands for the last five minutes…

This all began with Mulder. Like it always did. It seemed like an accident but it still ticked me off. Dana had been sitting on the blanket, her arms out behind her, supporting her weight. Mulder who had just gotten back from the bathroom sat down next to her, and "accidentally" placed his hand on top of hers.

But to my surprise it didn't affect Dana like it should have. She didn't jump or even pull her hand fucking away! She simply looked up at Mulder and smiled! She actually smiled! Before I knew it his hand was clamped around hers and by then they'd been starring in each other's eyes for a good minute.

I felt like I was turning red, I wanted so much to rip his fucking hand away from my sister's. But when I looked around, remembering I was trying to be inconspicuous, I noticed mom and Tara watching just as intently. It was as if everyone there was watching this weird chemistry that seemed to be overpowering my sister and Mulder.

Finally I let out a loud cough, I think it sounded real. When I glanced around Tara and mom were talking again and Mulder had his hand away from my sis. I was glad a simple thing like a cough worked. For now, anyway.

It wasn't until Tara and mom took Matthew with them on a walk I started feeling uncomfortable. I had been sitting in-between two blankets in a chair. Mulder and Dana were on my right, Charlie and where Tara and mom had been, on the left, all of them on the wide spread blankets.

I decided to get up and sit next to Charlie. I sat to the side of him, on the blanket, keeping sis and Mulder in perfect view. I asked my brother some question about his job or something but while he talked my focus was on Dana.

I couldn't help but ease drop. I couldn't help but tune in on what they were discussing, although it was hard to hear with Charlie blabbing on and on. All I really did hear was something about where fireworks came from, and parts of a story Mulder was telling.

Charlie finally left, gone to the bathroom, and I went back to my chair. I listened to Mulder and Dana but never looked at them. I think I was listening to the end of a long joke or something because I heard Mulder say something like, "and you know what he said?" The joke didn't matter though. I began to watch as Mulder leaned in toward my sister and whispered something in her ear.

Dana let out one of her great laughs and placed her hand on Mulder's chest. Soon both of them were laughing, laughing so much it became irritating. And as they began to stop laughing Mulder once again leaned in near Dana's ear and whispered something else. I was close enough to see how far he had come to her. His lips most certainly touched her ear, it made me sick to my stomach.

I hated watching. I hated listening. I hated eavesdropping. I hated him. I hated Dana for enjoying his presence. I hated mom for inviting him. I hated Charlie for giving him a chance. I hated Tara for making me come. I hated Matthew for having to put up with all this. I hated that dad was gone. I hated that mom was unhappy. I hated that Dana didn't notice mom's unhappiness. I hated that Melissa was gone. I hated fucking everything!

I could feel my face becoming redder and redder in anger. Finally I got up and barged in-between Mulder and Dana. I walked away and I didn't turn back….

And that's where I am now. Waiting. Waiting for someone, anyone, to come and see what's wrong. Why aren't they coming? Why aren't they concerned for me? Why am I the only one who wants to help this family become what it used to be?

I stand here now crying. Not balling like a kid, or sobbing like a woman, but just crying. Tears have welt up in my eyes and every thing is blurry. I want to know why things have happened they way they have. I want to know why they've happened to me. And I want to know how to change them.

**July 4th ****3:45**

I've been gone for awhile now. Over an hour. No one has made any effort to find me, from what I can tell. I've finally gotten rid of any sign of a cry, and brought myself back to the blankets. Mom is sitting with Dana now, Mulder is talking to Tara. And surprisingly Charlie is playing with Matthew.

I walked over to Tara, "can I talk to you?" She gets up, excusing herself from Dana, and following me onto a small trail that leads into a forest of trees and bush. I know we can talk privately here. I need to tell her what's been on my mind.

" Tara, I love you very much—you know that." I start smart. "and I know that you've supported me even when I've been wrong about things, and you seem to know what good ideas consist of, and what bad ideas consist of…" before I can say much she interrupts me.

"Bill, I know this is about Fox. I know you don't like him- and I know you blame him for Melissa's death. And I guess that's acceptable. But, the fact of the matter is, that Dana is very fond of him. And without Mulder, I know you don't want to hear this, but Dana wouldn't be alive," Tara pauses in front of me, folding her hands into mine.

"You've been doing really well so far, and I'm proud of you. But I think it's time you make an effort to forgive Fox and try to get to know him better, wouldn't you agree?" she puts one of her soft hands on my cheek, its obvious to her that I've cried.

I look into her eyes for a moment, thinking about our past, about Matthew. I take in a deep breath and nod. Slowly she pulls herself close to me and kisses me tenderly on the lips. I love Tara, so I agree to make more of an effort of getting to know… "Fox".

When we do get back to the blankets I've noticed that Dana and Mulder aren't there. I look around a little, trying to see if I can find them from afar.

"Where's Fox?" I ask mom. She looks at me surprised, I guess because I called him by his first name, she finally shakes off the shock and answers, "him and Dana went on a walk."

I begin to walk off in the direction I think they were headed in but mom calls out, "why don't you let them be, Bill. It's time you be making your great hotdogs anyway, isn't it!" I smile at mom and nod, if making hotdogs makes mom happy, I'll do it. But I won't be satisfied or relaxed till Dana and Mulder return.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxX **

"Hey Mulder I-I really appreciate you coming with me here, I know Bill's been giving you a hard time," Dana smiled as she looked up at Mulder. He smiled back.

"It's alright, except I'm just waiting for him to punch me out." Dana let out a little giggle, "I wouldn't let him do that."

Both of them stop now, I watch behind some bushes. I don't understand what's going on here but it's more obvious then I expected.

Dana reached out her hand, laying it on Mulder's cheek. She peered into his eyes like she had many times before, and he stared back with the same hunger. He took a sliding step closer, lightly placing his hands on her small waist.

I began to boil inside. I couldn't take this. Why was she doing this? Why was she letting him do this? She was smarter then this!

Dana moved her hand to the lower part of his jaw, inching closer to him by the second. Meanwhile one of Mulder's hands slid up her side, his hand stopping right below her breast. He cuffed his hand around the top of her rib cage then pulling her that extra inch he kissed her.

He kissed her!

Dana let his mouth explore hers, every movement he made sent a tingle through her body. Mulder slid both his hands around her back now, holding her closer. Because of her height she strained to keep her mouth level to his, but it didn't matter.

Nope, it didn't matter to me. Why would it have mattered that I accidentally fell? So I embarrassed myself…. Goddammit. I brushed myself off hastily then looked up at the two who were no longer in each other's embrace. I take a step forward, looking deeply into my sister's eyes. I shook my head as I look down at the ground.

"Dad would have been ashamed… and so should you," I said fiercely before turning my attention to Mulder. I could tell Mulder was getting ready for me to hit him. But that wasn't what I had in mind. That would have been too easy.

I simply stood in front of him, staring. I knew that was hurting more. Finally I thought of a few words that I knew would linger in him, "First you take away Melissa, then dad… now Dana." And with that, I walked away.

I walked far, far, far away. And quickly too. I stepped and jumped and galloped even through the park. I walked passed our picnic and toward the car. I know Tara saw me, but she didn't come to my aid.

I was getting into my car when Dana knocked on the window. I turned my head toward her, I think the expression on my face scared her. She looked like she wanted to back off, but just couldn't. Things had to be resolved.

I stepped out of my car slowly, my muscles twitching in anger. Dana just looked at me. She stood there and just watched.

"What!" I shouted. I glanced over at the picnic, mom was watching us.

"What's gotten into you?" Dana asked me with a frown. I frowned back. Wasn't it obvious?

"Dana…" I whined, "Your partner killed Melissa, not with his own bare hands maybe, but he did. And he killed dad. And now he's killing you!" I explained.

Dana shook her head at me, I don't understand why she doesn't understand. She now rests her hands on my shoulders lovingly.

"I know you don't approve of Fox, just like dad didn't. But dad had different reasons for being tough on him, dad gave him a chance."

I watched my baby sister plea with me, wanting me to approve of her. But I just couldn't. I again felt the tears welting up inside my eyes. I tried to hold back. Dana slid her arms around me, holding me tight.

I finally let go. I let it all go. I cried, I balled, I sobbed. And so did she. I wanted things back the way they were. I wanted dad back, I wanted to see him in his uniform, standing proud and tall in front of his crew. I wanted mom to smile out of goodness, not out of pain. I wanted Melissa here. I wanted it all back.

I held Dana tighter now. I wasn't ready to let her go yet. "I don't want to lose you," I finally come out with it. She pulls out of my arms and smiled at me- her smile has always remained the same.

"You're not going to lose me… and you haven't lost dad or Melissa either. You know that. You know their up there, in a better place. And when our time comes we'll be with them again. But for now, we have our lives to live, Bill. I love you, and I love mom, I love Charlie and Tara and Matthew…"

I interrupt her, I can't help it, "and Mulder?" She pauses. The answer is most obvious. She nods her head with a smile starting to form again. I can tell this is the first time she's admitted it aloud.

I pull her back into another tight hug, and then I let her go. I walk back with her to the blankets, to mom, to Tara, Charlie, Matthew and to Mulder. I stiffen up, suck my chest in and for the first time shake Mulder's hand.

Even surprising myself I pull him into a brotherly-love hug. He's just as surprised. I know things won't be perfect. I know I'll come close to losing Dana again and again. But, all of a sudden I have this feeling that when I'm not there to protect her, Mulder will be.

**July 4th ****7:00**

All of us are laying on the blankets now. Only another half hour till the fire works start. Matthew is enjoying his grandmother's arms, while Charlie stares up into the grey sky. I lay beside my wife, her fingers intertwined in-between mine. She's proud of me. But I'm still more impressed by her.

I look over at Dana now, I hadn't in awhile. Fox is lying on his side, Dana on her back. They're chatting about some thing or other. I don't pay attention to that. I watch as Muld--- Fox places his hand over her body to support his own weight. He leans in and passionately kisses my sister.

Dana shuts her eyes. She lets Mulder tickle her with his kisses. She lets him whisper things in her ear, lets him kiss and nibble at her ear. She laughs and lets his hand rest on her stomach. She lets him do the things that she wouldn't let any other man do.

I look away from the two. I'm not satisfied with what I've done. I don't think I've solved any problems. I haven't brought my dead loved ones back to life nor have I inched closer to their same fate.

But, with all that's happened in just one day- within only a few hours, I'm ok. I'm not as afraid, I'm not as anxious or worried. I'm actually tranquil. I'm actually serene.

The fireworks have started now. All of us are lying on our backs peering up at the bright lights and listening to the hissing sounds the ready to explode fireworks make. I smile at the big ones, I cuddle with my wife on the small ones.

I look one last time at Dana. Fox is kissing her again. I don't feel comfortable with the thought of someone "with" my sister, but by the way they look at each other, the way they always seem to be in unison, I can't help but think that some where my dad is looking over them with a smile, looking over mom with a smile, and that he's looking over me with that same smile. And I smile back


End file.
